The Rise of "The Let Them Theory": A Cultural Sensation
Mel Robbins’ book, The Let Them Theory: A Life-Changing Tool That Millions of People Can’t Stop Talking About, has become a cultural phenomenon since its release at the end of 2024. The self-improvement book, which encourages readers to stop worrying about others’ actions and focus on what they can control, has topped bestseller lists and sold over two million copies in print and audio formats. Robbins, a former lawyer, CNN legal analyst, and popular podcaster, has become a household name, earning six-figure sums for speaking engagements. The book’s success has been staggering, resonating with millions who embrace its empowering message of letting go of external pressures and focusing on personal growth.
A Virginia Army Wife’s Claim: The Origins of “Let Them”
However, a Virginia Army wife, Cassie Phillips, has come forward claiming that the “Let Them” philosophy at the heart of Robbins’ book was originally hers. In 2022, Phillips shared a poem titled “Let Them” on Facebook, along with a photo of her forearm tattoo bearing the phrase. The poem, which included relatable lines like, “If they are showing you who they are and not what you perceived them to be, LET THEM,” went viral, being shared over 50,000 times and inspiring thousands of additional posts.
Phillips, a 32-year-old mother of two, says the poem helped her cope with personal struggles, including her husband’s PTSD and her own suicidal depression. She believes her poem’s message is eerily similar to Robbins’ book, and she questions the timing and authenticity of Robbins’ claim to the philosophy. Phillips acknowledges that the phrase “Let Them” didn’t originate with her—she cites Tyler Perry’s Madea character as her inspiration—and admits the phrase has been widely used in popular culture. Still, she believes Robbins should have given her credit for her specific iteration of the idea.
Mel Robbins’ Response: A Denial of Plagiarism
Robbins categorically denies that her book was inspired by Phillips’ poem. She claims she has never read the poem and that her theory was born out of a personal experience during her son’s prom in 2023. Robbins’ daughter allegedly told her to “let them” enjoy their prom night without her micromanaging, a moment Robbins says fundamentally changed her approach to life. She has since expanded this idea into a comprehensive theory, citing the work of over 50 world-renowned experts.
Robbins dismisses the allegations of plagiarism as “nonsense,” arguing that her book is not just about two words but an entire framework for personal growth. She emphasizes that her success is not about stealing ideas but about creating something original and impactful. Robbins also points out that the phrase “Let Them” has been used in various forms of media and merchandise long before her book, further distancing herself from Phillips’ claims.
The Trademark Dispute: A Bigger Picture
The controversy took a new turn when Robbins filed to trademark the phrase “Let Them” in July 2024. The U.S. Patent and Trademark Office rejected her application, ruling that the phrase is a “commonplace term” and cannot be trademarked. The decision noted that “Let Them” appears on numerous products sold online, from jewelry to clothing, in various designs and fonts. Robbins’ team has requested an extension to respond to the ruling, but the case highlights the broader cultural resonance of the phrase.
A David and Goliath Moment: Cassie Phillips’ Perspective
Phillips calls the situation a “David and Goliath” battle, acknowledging the vast resources and influence Robbins has compared to her own. She doesn’t seek to undermines Robbins’ success but wishes Robbins had handled the situation differently. Phillips believes that giving her credit could have elevated her own platform as an artist, allowing more people to discover her work. She views the situation as a missed opportunity for authenticity and collaboration.
The Bigger Picture: The Power of “Let Them”
At the heart of this controversy is the universal appeal of the “Let Them” message—a simple yet powerful idea about letting go of what you can’t control. While the dispute over its origins continues, the phrase has undeniably resonated with millions, offering hope and empowerment to those struggling with personal challenges. Whether the credit goes to Robbins, Phillips, or someone else, the “Let Them” philosophy has become a cultural touchstone, reflecting the human desire to focus on what truly matters in life.
