The Heartbreaking Reality of Pregnancy Shaming: A Personal Story
An expectant mother from Melbourne, Madeleine, recently shared a deeply personal and unsettling experience that sheds light on a harsh reality many pregnant women face: unsolicited and intrusive comments about their bodies. While running a routine errand at her local grocery store, Madeleine was unexpectedly approached by a stranger who felt entitled to remark on her appearance. This encounter, though seemingly minor to some, highlights the emotional toll such comments can take on expectant mothers. Madeleine’s story is not unique, but it serves as a powerful reminder of the judgment and scrutiny that often accompany pregnancy.
In a TikTok video recounting the event, Madeleine described how the stranger focused on her visible baby bump, saying, “Oh, you’ve got a bit of belly hanging out there, love. There’s a gap in your clothes.” Startled and taken aback, Madeleine calmly explained that she was pregnant. To her surprise, the woman did not apologize or offer congratulations. Instead, she continued to pry, asking invasive questions about the size of Madeleine’s belly and her stage of pregnancy. “You’re pregnant, and that’s all you’ve got? That’s all the belly you’ve got? You must be very early on,” the stranger remarked.
Madeleine, who was 21 weeks pregnant at the time, was left feeling stunned and uncomfortable. She noted how surreal the exchange felt, especially when the woman seemed surprised to learn she was more than halfway through her pregnancy. “She was like, ‘Oh, god,’” Madeleine recounted, still clearly baffled by the stranger’s audacity. The encounter was so awkward that Madeleine admitted she didn’t know how to respond, a feeling many women can relate to when faced with such intrusive behavior. What made the situation even more jarring was that the comments came from another woman—a stark reminder that pregnancy shaming can come from anyone, regardless of gender.
Pregnancy Shaming: A Widespread Issue
Madeleine’s experience is sadly not an isolated incident. Since sharing her story on TikTok, numerous other moms have come forward with their own experiences of being subjected to invasive and hurtful remarks during pregnancy. One woman recalled being told, “You’re looking pretty chunky” when she revealed she was 30 weeks pregnant. Another shared how a stranger assumed she was carrying twins because of her size, despite being only 30 weeks along. A third mom remembered a stranger questioning whether her baby was measuring okay because she appeared “small for 26 weeks.” These stories, while painful, demonstrate that pregnancy shaming is a widespread issue that affects women from all walks of life.
Pregnant women already endure significant physical, mental, and emotional changes. Their bodies are undergoing profound transformations, and they are often navigating heightened emotions and vulnerabilities. What they do not need—and what they certainly do not deserve—is to be subjected to unsolicited opinions, judgment, or scrutiny from strangers. Yet, time and time again, women find themselves in situations where their bodies are treated as public property, open to comment and criticism. Madeleine’s story and the flood of similar accounts that followed serve as a stark reminder that this behavior is not only unacceptable but also deeply harmful.
The Emotional Toll of Pregnancy Shaming
The emotional impact of pregnancy shaming cannot be overstated. For many women, pregnancy is a time of great joy and anticipation, but it is also a period of vulnerability. The constant scrutiny of their bodies can lead to feelings of self-consciousness, insecurity, and even shame. Madeleine’s encounter left her feeling awkward and unsure of how to respond, a reaction that speaks to the powerlessness many women feel when confronted with such behavior. For others, the experience can be even more damaging, contributing to anxiety, depression, or a negative overall perception of their pregnancy journey.
What makes these encounters even more painful is the lack of empathy and understanding behind such comments. Strangers often fail to recognize that their words carry weight, and that pregnant women are already grappling with profound changes in their lives. A simple “Congratulations” or a kind smile can go a long way, but instead, many women are met with judgment or invasive questions. This lack of compassion is not only disheartening but also isolating, making women feel like their bodies and experiences are fair game for public commentary.
Shifting the Focus: Respect and Empathy for Expectant Mothers
It’s time to shift the conversation. Pregnancy is not an open invitation for public scrutiny or unsolicited opinions. Every woman’s body is unique, and every pregnancy is different. Some women carry their babies in ways that are more visibly apparent, while others may not show as much. Some may gain more weight, while others may gain less. These differences are normal and should be respected, not criticized.
Moreover, the stage of pregnancy is not always easy to gauge from appearance alone. Madeleine’s stranger assumed she was “very early on” because her bump was not as large as the woman expected it to be at 21 weeks. This assumption not only ignored the fact that every body is different but also overlooked the fact that Madeleine was, in fact, more than halfway through her pregnancy. Such comments are not only hurtful but also dismissive of the incredible work that a woman’s body is doing during this time.
A Call to Action: Let’s Create a Kinder, More Supportive World for Moms
Madeleine’s experience and the stories that followed are a call to action. It’s time for society to recognize that pregnant women deserve respect, kindness, and understanding. Their bodies are not Fair Game for commentary, and they should not be made to feel uncomfortable or ashamed for something as natural and beautiful as carrying a child.
For those who have experienced pregnancy shaming, know that you are not alone. Your feelings are valid, and your body is remarkable. For those who have not experienced it, let Madeleine’s story serve as a reminder of the importance of empathy and kindness. A simple “Congratulations” or a warm smile can mean the world to an expectant mother. Let’s create a world where pregnant women feel supported, celebrated, and respected—not scrutinized or shamed.
Ultimately, every mom deserves to feel empowered and confident during her pregnancy journey. Let’s work together to create a society that uplifts and values expectant mothers, rather than one that judges and criticizes them.
